Ballroom Dance Etiquette, duh!

  1. Make Eye Contact
    Ballroom dance robots will be invented by Korean scientists in 2081. Till then you are stuck with 2-leged bipeds. This species tends to treat lack of eye contact as a not so subtle sign of disrespect.
  2. Smile, pretty please
    Add some genuine warmth to that. Tis not that hard!; and its an easy 'step' to both lead and follow -- seriously.
  3. Chill!
    Accidents happen. Sometimes we tend to step on your feet, you might get that odd shove in a crowded dance floor, your partner may not be the best lead/follow. Tis okay, dont have to get angry; life is good dear; tis not the Iraq war.
  4. Be Creative... Make Mistakes!
    Its okay to try something different, try a strange pattern, try a dance to a different music. If you stumble, it doesnt come out well or your fall flat on the dance floor, look up #3 above. Side effect -- you have just managed to entertain people around you -- sweet . (Not easy, ask a certain Jerry Seinfield).
  5. You are 27, they are 72
    You will be lucky to be 90 someday. You will be luckier if you can shake a leg at that age. So, what's your problem?
  6. 'I have 2-left feet, I cant dance'
    Actually you dont. Take a closer look; ouch they both look crooked, but crooked in different ways! It took you 10 years of 'we dont need no education' to be able to spheak, rhead and wright :-). Give your feet some time, after all they learnt to walk.
  7. 'Gentlemen should always be the lead when dancing?'
    You mean gentle chauvinistic men? To enforce rule #7, drink a vial of false ego, and travel backwards many many (seriously many) years in time. The good news for you --- physicists have not yet ruled out backward time travel (see infinite parallel universe theory for an explanation).
  8. 'Ladies should always wait to be asked for a dance?'
    Seriously babe, if you thought waiting 3hrs in a dance club and being asked for 2 dances was an efficient use of your time, you should think again. Side note -- There is a species on this planet called men (not to be confused with guys, kids, wimps etc.) who like assertive and confident women. If you ask 40 times, and are rejected 4 times, you have got yourself a whopping (you do the math) dances. Are you stuck in a club with these arcane rules?; jeez dear, you deserve better.
Page Maintained by Sundar Iyer
Last modified: Thu Aug 11th 00:32:23 PDT 2006